


Who you are tomorrow begins with what you do today.

by lydiamxrtin



Series: Bad Things Happen Bingo [4]
Category: 9-1-1: Lone Star (TV 2020)
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Established Carlos Reyes/TK Strand, Let TK express his feelings about his parents being selfish, M/M, Paul being a supportive brother, TK Strand Needs A Hug
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-13
Updated: 2021-02-13
Packaged: 2021-03-13 16:22:33
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,756
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29404758
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lydiamxrtin/pseuds/lydiamxrtin
Summary: TK had gone to his parents for advice, not to have them turn the conversation into another argument. Broken-hearted over his fight with Carlos, TK finally tells his parents how their behaviour has made him feel.Later TK seeks advice from Paul about how to fix things with Carlos.
Relationships: Carlos Reyes/TK Strand, TK Strand & Paul Strickland
Series: Bad Things Happen Bingo [4]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2119380
Comments: 14
Kudos: 187
Collections: Bad Things Happen Bingo





	Who you are tomorrow begins with what you do today.

**Author's Note:**

> So i'm back! I had this idea in my head after watching 2x04, just poor TK he wanted advice about what to do with Carlos and his parents didn't really seem to care that their son was heartbroken. 
> 
> I just want to make it clear, I don't hate Owen or Gywn, I think their complex characters that have made mistakes.
> 
> ANYWAY, hope you all enjoy!💗
> 
> p.s for those of you that have requested bthb prompts I have not forgotten about them I've got a full time job now so It's going to take some time and I wanna make sure they are perfect!

TK leaned on the counter, trying to work out what the hell his parents were talking about. His hands wrapped tighter around the mug hoping the warmth would make everything better, it didn’t. 

TK squeezed his eyes shut, partly to try and take in the information his parents had given him and partly because his eyes felt heavy. After getting back from Carlos’s last night TK had laid awake in his bed staring at the ceiling, thinking how he preferred Carlos’s bed, his sheets, how he preferred lying next to Carlos, it didn’t take TK long to realise he preferred everything about being with Carlos. 

He thought about calling his boyfriend a few times but froze each time. What was he meant to say? The ache in his chest since he had heard Carlos call him his friend still loomed and the guilt and shame of his parting remarks still hung heavy in TK’s mind,  _ I made some more room in your closet,  _ TK felt sick as he played the words over in his mind. He had just been so angry, so _hurt._

He needed to fix it, but he didn’t know how. Since being together, this was their first real fight, and TK was frozen by the fear that he might ruin it beyond damage.

“So your saying I need to be gentler?” He asked his father, his brows scrunched together. TK had definitely  _ not  _ been gentle with his approach to Carlos, he was just so angry, the kind of anger that was bread of fear and completely took over his mind.

Owen just stared at the table, seemingly somewhere else “What…” he said looking back up at TK, “I don’t think I said that,” He said, shaking his head.

TK sighed, biting his lip, he was lost, completely lost. “Okay, so I need to be more decisive? Assertive?” He asked, turning to face his mother, hoping to find some wisdom or advice there but her eyes were fixated on Owen, one brow raised. 

“Apparently that is not the way to go,” She said, her eyes swarming with frustration.

TK looked between his parents, noticing how tense they were. Their eyes were locked like they were waiting for the other one to say something. TK frowned, they clearly didn’t agree on what TK should do but-TK looked at them again, the realisation hitting him like a bullet in the chest; his father saying years instead of months, their complete lack of agreement.

TK scoffed, shaking his head as he pushed himself off the table, “Oh my god.” He said, a sarcastic laugh escaping his lips, “You’re not even listening” His hands gripping the ledge of the island.

His mother peeled her eyes away from Owen, frowning harder, “We are,” She said, reaching across to take TK’s hand when he pulled it back, stepping away from the counter.

“Really? Because it seemed like you two were having your own argument there,” He’d seen that look between them before, that ‘advice’ they’d given him had been nothing but a veiled argument.

Gwyn sighed, lowering her head, “TK sweetie it’s not like that-”

“No?” He snapped, both his parents recoiling slightly from the sudden burst. 

But it wasn’t sudden, the anger and frustration had been bubbling since he left Carlos’s- no since he’d heard Carlos refer to him as a friend, it was banging against his chest to get out, clawing to get out. His parents continued arguing and had seemingly knocked a small crack into the wall around his emotions, one that was big enough for them to start seeping out.

“We were just trying to help,” Owen said, coming to walk around the island to where TK was standing.

Another crack in his calm facade, “No you were taking a conversation that had nothing to do with you and making it about you, like you always do,” He yelled, his brows scrunched together.

It wasn’t the first time TK had gone to his parents with something, desperately needing advice and an hour later he’d walk away even more confused as his parents scream at one another in the next room.

“Woah TK where is this coming from?” Owen asked, coming to stand in front of TK, his head tilted to the side.

TK wanted to laugh, but he didn’t, he found himself unable to find even the hint of amusement in their conversation despite the irony of his fathers question. He crossed his arms over his chest, using one hand to point between his parents, “This is coming from me, needing to talk to you two and you’re both so wrapped up in your own drama you don’t even hear what I have to say!” It was an impressive skill his parents had, the ability to hear his words but somehow still have no real idea of what he had said.

The normally large kitchen shrunk and Owen felt closer, too close. TK took a step back just wanting spaces from them, from everyone, “Look son,” Owen started, his voice soft, “Me and your mother are always here for you,” That did make TK laugh, but there was no joy in it, just sadness, the kind that hung heavy in the air.

“No, you’re not.” He yelled, “Do you know what’s been going on in my life these last four months?” He asked, looking between the pair, their faces betraying the answer.

“No but that’s because you're barely here,” Owen said.

“And why do you think that is?” Apparently, neither knew the answer, both just looking at the other, “I’m tired of being used as some chip you can cash in when you wanna try and get a rise out of the other!” He called. TK took a step back, turning around as he wiped his hand down his face. TK just faced the wall for a moment, he just wanted everything to be okay again, he just wanted Carlos. TK felt the tears prick the corners of his eyes, his breath shaky as he let out a deep sigh. He turned around to see his parents still staring at him, their eyes filled with concern but it did little to comfort him.

“My boyfriend,” TK started, his voice just as shaky as his breath, “The person I love more than  _ anything _ , doesn’t want me to meet his parents, or even acknowledge we're together,” The admission left a bitter and acidic taste in his mouth, it was something TK never thought he would say and his broke his fucking heart, “I blew up at him and I don’t even know if we’re still together, if he even wants to see me again” That fear had not left TK’s mind since he’d left Carlos. The fear that he had ruined things between them  _ again  _ was like a vice around TK’s lungs, making breathing hard. “I came to my parents for advice because I have  _ no _ idea what to do and all you two can do is argue.” He finished, his chest heaving heavily.

His mother looked down at the table, but TK could see the hurt and guilt in her eyes, the way she bit her lip just as TK did. 

He didn’t want to hurt his parents, he didn’t want to hurt Carlos even, but he had.

His father stepped closer, reaching out to put his hand on his son's shoulder, “Your right we’re sorry TK, sometimes parents make mistakes” His father smiled as if it would fix everything.

Normally TK would expect the apology and just forget about it, but today wasn’t one of those days. 

TK shook his head, shrugging his fathers hand of his shoulder as he pushed past him, “Yeah well you’ve been making this mistake for 26 years and I’m tired of it, I’m tired of my problems always being second thought-”

“You are our only priority-” His mother said, apparently having stood from her seat to grab TK’s hand, keeping from leaving the kitchen.

He wanted to believe that, he wanted to believe that more than anything, but he didn’t. “No the station was your priority, the fire crew,” He said to his father, “And the firm was yours,” It was then with his mother standing in front of him he noticed her eyes looked glassier, the guilt flared in his chest but the anger was louder.

His mother squeezed his hand, “We always loved you son-”

“I know that,” TK didn’t doubt that, in fact, if there was one thing he was sure of it was that his parents did love him. TK looked up at the ceiling, biting his lip as the tears finally poured over the edge. TK looked back down at his parents, both so confused he didn’t know if it made him feel guilty or angrier, “but loving me and being there for me are two very different things,” He said, TK pulled his hand from his mother's grip, watching as the sadness crept even further into her eyes. Growing up TK's parents always told him they loved him, that they were there for him, but TK had seen little evidence of the second one growing up, “You were great at one, but failed at the other,” He whispered, not able to look them in the eye. 

The kitchen fell silent as TK turned around, grabbing his keys off the side as he stormed out, leaving a mess behind him as he had done with Carlos.

~~~~~~~

TK rammed his fist into the punching bag, bouncing on his feet as he altered hands. After he left his parents TK had to decide where to go. Carlos’s was now out of the question, and TK wasn’t in the mood to wander the streets; he wanted to hit something. 

Another punch connected with the bag, a loud thud echoing through the gym.

“So are we picturing an ex or…” TK glanced over to see Paul hovering by the door. He was wearing a polo and jeans clearly just finishing his shift. TK looked back at the punching bag, clenching his jaw as he repeatedly struck the bag, his hands aching from the lack of protection but he didn’t care, if anything he welcomed it, a nice discretion from his mind, “I don’t think hitting that any harder is going to make you feel better.” Paul said, walking further into the room.

TK was willing to test this theory, “I’m fine,” He called, but as he pulled back for another blow, he realised he didn’t feel even remotely better. TK sighed, dropping his fist. 

He walked over to the side to grab a towel and wiped it down his face, slumping down on the bench. TK started to unwrap the wraps from his hand, holding the bandages in his hands. “What happened?” Paul asked.

“I blew up at Carlos and then went to my parents and blew up at them” It was a short version of a very long and sad story that TK had little energy to go into.

“Can I sit down or am I going to get blown up too? I kinda like this shirt,” Paul asked, a comforting smile on his face.

TK felt the corners of his lip twitch up, but they did not reach a smile and TK was sure they wouldn't until he had made things right with Carlos, “No it’s fine” He sighed, looked down at the space next to him, “I’ve got nothing left” He lamented. In less than 24 hours TK had managed to drive away nearly everyone he held dear.

Paul walked into the room, dumping his bag onto the ground as he sat next to TK, “Why’d you blow up at Carlos?” He asked.

TK pulled and ripped at the fabric in his hands, “We bumped into his parents today and he introduced me as his friend,” It didn’t hurt any less than the first time he had said it, the words feeling wrong on his tongue.

“He’s not out?” Paul asked.

“No he is, he just doesn’t want to rub their noses in it, apparently their traditional,” He said, repeating Carlos’s words from earlier. 

"That must be hard for Carlos, to have to hide part of himself from his parents," Paul said.

TK wanted to say he had thought of that when Carlos had told him, that he'd sat down and let Carlos explain how it made him feel. He wanted to say that he thought about how it would make Carlos feel but... TK pushed himself off the bench, “I never thought about it like that," TK quietly admitted. TK cringed as he thought about what he had said, how he had acted. While most if not all of what his parents had said was not helpful in any way, his mother's words about feeling safe rang in his mind. “I blew up all because-” TK stopped, looking down at his shoes. 

“Wanna finish that sentence,” Paul asked, nodding to the empty space TK had once sat in.

He walked back over to the gap, slumping down into the seat. While deep down TK knew his parents weren't talking about him, his mother's words about feeling unsafe in the relationship rang true. TK pulled the bandage tight in his hands, looking up at Paul who was waiting for him to continue, “All I could think of when he said ‘friend’ was-was Alex.” Paul’s face softened, his head ducking slightly, “I had been so sure we were on the same page and then...then I was wrong, and it broke my heart” TK sighed. When Carlos had said those words it was like TK had been ripped right back to that god awful dinner. Where Alex had said he’d been cheating, that he was in love with someone else, but wanted that he cared for TK as a friend. 

“Carlos loves you TK,” Paul reassured.

“Does he?” TK asked, looking over at Paul who now looked blurrier through the tears in TK’s eyes. “I was a complete ass at the start and then went off at him today and…” TK cursed, pulling the fabric even harder. Paul reached over, gently taking the fabric from TK’s hands, lowering his head to see he could look him in the eyes.

“Do you still love him?” He asked.

TK scoffed, it was the easiest thing he’d been asked in the last two days, “Of course,” he breathed.

“Then go work this out,” Paul smiled, knocking his shoulder gently into TK’s “I’m a terrible wingman so if you two break up your shit outta luck,” TK gave a small laugh, more a huff of air but it was something. 

TK didn’t want to break up with Carlos’s, it was the last thing he wanted. “Thanks, Paul,” He smiled. TK wanted to be happy, but the hurt was still heavy in his chest; he still didn’t know if Carlos still even wanted to be with him, maybe TK had fucked it up beyond repair, hurt that Paul had been the one to give him this advice, not his own parents.

“What else on your mind,” Paul asked.

TK sighed, “Nothing,”

“Tense shoulders, hands fidgeting, staring off clearly thinking about something, and judging by the way your brow is furrowed imma guess something bad,” Paul rattled off the list, his eyes looking TK up and down

Tk gave a playful glare, “What are you training to be a therapist off that clock” He said, averting his eyes from his friends in case he managed to find any more secrets TK was hiding.

“Just being a friend,” Paul smiled, “Your parents?” He asked.

TK didn’t even question how he knew that information, “I definitely don’t wanna talk about them,” He said, standing up from the chair to retrieve his jumper from over by the punching bag, “They're just so- they never seem to, it’s like they don’t even try- “ TK clenched his jaw, landing a blow against the punching bag, his knuckles burning from the lack of glove.

“No yeah, you seem like you’re dealing with that well, definitely no need to talk about it” Paul said, the sarcasm clear in his voice.

TK threw his jacket on, reaching up to run his hands through his hair as he tugged on the ends. “They seem like an intense pair,” Paul asked, although it sounded more like a question.

“That's one word for it,” TK sighed, his arms fell to his side as the anger and frustration that had been fueling for the day turned into a tired sadness, “I just wanted them to listen to me you know?” He whispered, leaning against one of the pillars in the gym, reaching up to play with the string of his hoodie, “To give me advice like parents do but instead they used it as a chance to take jabs at one another,” There wasn’t anger in his voice this time, and TK didn’t miss the way he sounded like a little boy again. His parents had the unique ability to make him feel like a kid despite the fact he was 26.

Paul pushed himself up from the bench, walking over to TK, a sympathetic smile on his face as he stood with his hands in his pocket, “I’m sorry TK,” He said.

“I just wanted them to listen, for once I didn’t want to have to figure it out on my own” TK was tired of figuring things out and fucking it up, he just wanted someone to tell him the right thing to do so he didn’t fuck up. 

TK rested his back against the pillar, his head coming to rest upon it with a light thud. TK was angry with his parents, he was. But it wasn’t the whole reason he had blown up at his parents. “The worse part,” TK winced, “I did the exact same thing with Carlos,” He admitted.

Paul frowned, crossing his arms over his chest, “He was trying to talk to me but I didn’t listen, made the whole conversation about my feelings and then I asked him to explain and when he did I didn’t listen,” TK cursed. The whole drive back to Carlos’s he had been trying to work out what to say and in the end he had just yelled and made shitty  _ shitty  _ comments that were wrong, based on anger and fear and nothing else. When Carlos had tried to explain he had heard his words, but he didn’t listen, too wrapped up in his own insecurities. 

Paul placed his hand on his shoulder, giving it a small squeeze, “You’re not your parents TK,” He offered, “You just made a mistake,” 

That thought didn’t comfort TK, all it did was make him realise how similar he truly was to his parents, “That’s what my parents said, that they’d made a mistake,” 

Paul scoffed, “The differences is your 26 and were hurting,” TK went to interrupt but Paul held his hand in the air, “Now that doesn’t make it right but, it’s easy to make mistakes when we're hurt,” TK settled back against the wall, “Your parents, they are two grown-ass adults who should have known better, maybe blowing up wasn’t the right way to go about it but you were right to tell them how you feel,” Paul reassured, TK gave the man a soft smile and a nod. Paul gave his shoulder a final pat letting his hands fall to his side, “Now you’re not blowing up go talk to Carlos, then tomorrow work it out with your parents,” He smiled and for the first time in two days TK felt like things might be okay.

“You know,” TK smiled, “If you weren’t a firefighter you would make an excellent therapist,” Paul laughed, shaking his head a little, “I don’t know why I’m paying for mine when I’ve got you,” TK smiled.

Paul walked over to the bench, grabbing his bag and slinging it over his shoulder, “Well this session the next one is going to cost you a beer,” Paul joked, giving TK a wink as he walked towards the large arch leading out of the gym.

“Paul,” TK called. The man paused, turning around to look at TK, “Thank you,” TK smiled, nodding his head at Paul. 

“Anytime brother,” He smiled back, leaving TK alone in the gym.

TK looked around the empty space, the room suddenly felt bigger and TK felt more alone. He didn’t want to be here anymore, he didn’t want to be alone. 

TK quickly changed into a pair of jeans and a new hoodie, shoving his workout clothes into the locker and calling an uber; he wanted to go home.

~~~~~~~

The car pulled up outside the house and TK thanked the driver, stepping out into the cold night. The car drove away, taking the light with him. TK stood at the end of the drive, hearing the cicadas filling the quiet night. TK had thought about what he was going to say on the way over to Carlos, he tried to replay his parent's conversation to see if he could salvage any useable information. 

TK took in a deep breath, letting out a deep sigh as he walked up the path, each step feeling heavier than the last. TK paused as he came to the front door, he reached into his pocket and pulled the key out, turning it over and over in his hand.

Any other night TK would simply unlock the door and step inside Carlos’s house and make himself at home because it was home for TK. 

Bit pulled at his bottom lip with his teeth as he stared down at that key, he slipped it back into his pocket. He had no idea if Carlos even wanted him here, or wanted him at all. He reached out and knocked on the door.

He was going to make this right because not being with Carlos wasn’t an option. 

The door slowly opened, and Carlos stood on the other side. 

TK sucked in a small breath as he stared at Carlos, wanting nothing more than to just run into his arms and forget everything that had happened. 

But relationships didn’t work like that, they couldn’t just forget and move one. If this relationship was going to work; and fuck TK wanted- _ needed _ it to work, they were going to have to talk, really talk.

So that's what TK was going to do, because nothing, no problem was worth losing the man he loved.

**Author's Note:**

> 💗Hope you guys enjoyed it!💗


End file.
